Post by Adalie Bates on Nov 2, 2008 13:06:19 GMT -4
I'm not crazy
But I'm stuck here in this room
With the padded walls
Everything is white
It hurts my eyes
White. Sterile. Pure. Clean. Safe. Safe from myself, deserted in this room.
I'm not crazy
But I'm fed through a slot in the wall
The wall must be eight inches thick
Because that is how deep the slot cuts through the emptiness
The food tastes bland
Tasteless. Emotionless. Blank. Distant. Safe. Safe from myself, confined in this room.
I'm not crazy
But I can only eat on paper plates
So I can't harm myself
I'm not that suicidal, or am I?
What's the reasoning, I could still give myself a paper cut
Frigid. Remote. Reserved. Icy. Safe. Safe from myself, stuck in this room.
I'm not crazy
But apparently here I'm suppoosed to be safe from myself
And so is everyone else
I didn't mean to hurt her
I just wanted to B***h to shut up
Memory. Awareness. Reflection. Remembrance. Safe. Safe from myself, abandoned in this room.
I'm not crazy
But they are making me feel like I might be
I wonder if I could kill myself here
I wonder how padded the walls really are
I wonder if anyone would care, but how would they be able to stop me?
Crazed. Mental. Deranged. Erractic. Safe. Safe from myself, isolated in this room.
I'm not crazy
But they found me slamming myself against the walls
Knocking every bit of breath out of my lungs
Passed out on the floor
They put me in a straight jacket
Overlooked. Ignored. Disregarded. Perhaps Forgotten. But Safe. Safe from myself, neglected in this room.
I'm not crazy
But I'm being constricted in this jacket
Meant to keep me safe
Every hour, on the hour
I'm checked on to make sure that the jacket is still secure
Restrained. Entwined. Interlaced. Somewhat Forgotten. Safe. Safe from myself, roped in this room.
I'm not crazy
But I'm lost to myself
I can't be found
And never will be
I'll stay awry
Floating away. Hidden inside. Bottled up. All secure. Numb. Numb because there is nothing left to save, nothing else to hide, nothing more to be protected from.
And somehow
When there is none
Of me left
Behind
Just an empty insane asylum
Safe. Safe from myself, buried in my grave.
But I'm stuck here in this room
With the padded walls
Everything is white
It hurts my eyes
White. Sterile. Pure. Clean. Safe. Safe from myself, deserted in this room.
I'm not crazy
But I'm fed through a slot in the wall
The wall must be eight inches thick
Because that is how deep the slot cuts through the emptiness
The food tastes bland
Tasteless. Emotionless. Blank. Distant. Safe. Safe from myself, confined in this room.
I'm not crazy
But I can only eat on paper plates
So I can't harm myself
I'm not that suicidal, or am I?
What's the reasoning, I could still give myself a paper cut
Frigid. Remote. Reserved. Icy. Safe. Safe from myself, stuck in this room.
I'm not crazy
But apparently here I'm suppoosed to be safe from myself
And so is everyone else
I didn't mean to hurt her
I just wanted to B***h to shut up
Memory. Awareness. Reflection. Remembrance. Safe. Safe from myself, abandoned in this room.
I'm not crazy
But they are making me feel like I might be
I wonder if I could kill myself here
I wonder how padded the walls really are
I wonder if anyone would care, but how would they be able to stop me?
Crazed. Mental. Deranged. Erractic. Safe. Safe from myself, isolated in this room.
I'm not crazy
But they found me slamming myself against the walls
Knocking every bit of breath out of my lungs
Passed out on the floor
They put me in a straight jacket
Overlooked. Ignored. Disregarded. Perhaps Forgotten. But Safe. Safe from myself, neglected in this room.
I'm not crazy
But I'm being constricted in this jacket
Meant to keep me safe
Every hour, on the hour
I'm checked on to make sure that the jacket is still secure
Restrained. Entwined. Interlaced. Somewhat Forgotten. Safe. Safe from myself, roped in this room.
I'm not crazy
But I'm lost to myself
I can't be found
And never will be
I'll stay awry
Floating away. Hidden inside. Bottled up. All secure. Numb. Numb because there is nothing left to save, nothing else to hide, nothing more to be protected from.
And somehow
When there is none
Of me left
Behind
Just an empty insane asylum
Safe. Safe from myself, buried in my grave.